How to Restart Your Life – At Least Some Ideas

Getting Stuck Or Needing A Hand Up

Sometimes we get stuck in the same rut and feel like we are caught in Groundhog Day.  Or sometimes shitty things happen to us and we start circling the drain.  Maybe your world just got turned upside down and you don’t know what to do or who to trust.  In every life there comes a time when we feel like we could use some assistance in breaking out of the same old patterns or we just need to find some inspirational light to help us get moving down a better path.  Sometimes we have other folks in our life to be there to help but let’s face it, they have lives of their own.  When you need some assistance to restart your life, here’s a few ideas to get you started:

 

Same Old, Same Old

 

 

 

 

 

 

Endings Are Not Always a Bad Thing

When something ends, whether it be a job or a marriage or a business, it can be chest clutching, cold sweat inducing, jaw dropping horrifying.  Like the walls are closing in and my world is going to end kind of feeling.  Once you’ve put some time and distance between the big event and have started to move on you see it with a fresh set of eyes.  Each situation that ends gives us a chance to grow.  We learn from it and if we are half-way smart at all, make adjustments so that we either don’t get in the same type situation or if we do, we know better how to handle it.  I am a big believer that things happen for a reason and in hindsight most of the time we are happy things ended because it opens up new doors for us.

Moving Through Life is Not Smooth

It’s actually more like climbing stairs that are really jagged and sometimes go down instead of up.  If you are mindful you will eventually move up to bigger and better things but there’s lots and lots of bumps.  Sometimes there’s big jumps up but just as often there is typically an almost as big step down.  The process of life is that it is never a straight shot.  Have some patience with yourself and if you are putting energy and time into positive things enjoy that process and believe it will work out well.

Let Go Of The PastIf you Wanna Fly

Look, it happened.  What’s done is done.  When something shitty happens and we are feeling how unfair life is our natural state of emotion is to get really pissed and kick and scream.  Now stop to think about it, how does this help our situation?  Well the obvious answer is, it doesn’t.  Every difficult thing in our life goes hand in hand with the opportunity for personal growth and learning new things, new ways, finding new discoveries.  We have to realize that EVERYONE has difficult times in their lives.  Once we realize this and most importantly accept this we can put some rational thought into and see it as an opportunity to grow and learn a lesson that will help us better next time.

Focus On What You Can Change And Control

This one has been done to death but if you are anything like me you have to consciously and consistently remind yourself that there are many things outside your control that influence your life.  When I am at my best I will only try to control exactly what I can.  And that is very difficult for me as I am a doer and like to manage my life a certain way, a way that works for me.  Now the problem I run into is not everyone in my life is exactly aligned with that.  As a matter of fact, they even seem to have their own agenda.  How dare they!  Wasting your time and as important your ENERGY on things that are beyond your control is a big fat recipe for frustration and will keep you stagnant.  Invest your time and energy into things you can change, and that mostly means you.

Start With One Thing

When you are stuck in a pit and don’t see anyway up it can be overwhelming.  When multiple areas in your life are in disarray and you can’t see the forest for  the trees things can seem hopeless.  When you look at the smoking ruin that you are currently calling your life and don’t see anything you like what can you do?  It’s all so hopeless!  I have too much to change because I don’t know what to do!  Well, that’s when you take a deep breath first of all.  Once you’ve calmed yourself down a bit make a list of some of the things you’d like to change in your life.  Don’t list everything because then you are going to be overwhelmed again.  List 3-4 things that are the MOST important to you to change. Now pick one and start.  That’s it, just pick one.  Do that for a few weeks or a month until it becomes a habit.  Once it’s become normal for you and that part of your life has begun to improve pick a 2nd item and start that.  Do it for a month and then pick number 3.  This is how we rebuild our house.  One brick at a time.  You have to look at it this way and take the long view.  Rome wasn’t built in a day.

Remember this:  You are never a finished product.  Life is a continuous process of learning (for those folks smart enough to remember it).  Everything you do, everything you say, every action you take affects everything else in your life.  You can be wildly up one week and wildly down the next.  Or month to month or year to year.  Or if you’re in sales day to day!  Think of how plans are rarely EXACTLY on course.  Their guidance systems are CONSTANTLY tweaking and changing and adjusting the course to help the plan arrive safely at it’s destination.  Now we don’t exactly have a destination like that but we have to continually change our course here and there.

I look forward to hearing your thoughts as well.

All my best!

Mat A.

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8 Comments

  1. Even though I am not a man, you are totally speaking to me! I am sure that this information is helpful for everyone.
    I agree with you 100%. I had to hit the very bottom to find all of the different avenues that have led me to where I am today. I believe that life is a series of puzzles, and how we try to solve them decides whether we learn anything or not.
    Thank you for this uplifting post!

    1. Irma – thank you for your note! I really appreciate the feedback and could not agree more – life is a series of puzzles. The fun trick is to realize this is how it always is and to have fun while we learn and enjoy. Cheers!

  2. It has taken me a long time in my life to figure this out I am now 32 and last year I realised that what is the point worrying about the things you cant’t change in your life. I am now a lot more focused and driven person. Should we say a man with a plan lol and my life now has a scene of direction. We all need to keep moving forward and learn by our mistakes. Thanks for the great article.

    1. Hi James,
      Thank you for the feedback and note. As you are only 32 I think you’ve got a head start! A man with a plan is a good thing! It feels good to have a sense of direction and being somewhat of a control nut with my own life I have to constantly remind myself that other people aren’t necessarily (okay, rarely) on my own agenda.

    1. Thank you Lance, appreciate the feedback. I too have found it to be beneficial in many aspects of my life, especially when I tend to get “stuck”. Have a great one and thanks again!

  3. Great article and truly inspirational. I love these tips/ideas. Sometimes, we all get into our darkest moments and it may seem very difficult to see the light again. But in order to continue to live a life – a life of happiness, we must change our situations. I love how you say let go of the past. That one is so important as I find many people linger on the past – regrets or things they cannot change. What is the point of this? The past is in the past and there is no way of traveling back in time. Let go and move on and you will feel much better! Focus on the present and let the future come.

    1. Hi Rob!
      Thanks for taking the time to stop by and read the article – much appreciated. I agree, many people do linger on the past and can focus too much time and energy there. I have been guilty of this as well. I love the quote that says “resentment is like drinking poison and waiting for the other person to die”. So true!!

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